“I’d kind of planned that 2017 was, you know, going to be the year that I work on new music, and I have a baby,” the country crooner, who is mom of 3-year-old Isaiah, told CBS Sunday Morning. “We got pregnant early 2017, and didn’t work out.”
While Underwood, 35, says that she and Fisher, 38, remained optimistic following her first miscarriage, they suffered another loss later that year. “In the beginning it was like, ‘OK, God, we know this is, just wasn’t your timing. And that is all right. We will bounce back and figure our way through it.’ And got pregnant again in the spring, and it didn’t work out,” she explained.
The Grammy winner went on to say that she suffered a third miscarriage the following year. “Got pregnant again, early 2018. Didn’t work out. So, at that point, it was just kind of like, ‘OK, like, what’s the deal? What is all of this?’”
The “Cry Pretty” singer admitted she wrestled with her emotions following her losses. “I had always been afraid to be angry,” she said. “Because we are so blessed … I’m like, ‘If we can never have any other kids, that’s OK, because [Isaiah] is amazing.’ And I have this amazing life. Like, really, what can I complain about? I can’t. I have an incredible husband, incredible friends, an incredible job, an incredible kid. Can I be mad? No.”
Still, she says she got angry after what she thought was yet another miscarriage in her current pregnancy. “I got mad … I was like, ‘Why on Earth do I keep getting pregnant if I can’t have a kid? Like, what is this? Shut the door. Like, do something. Either shut the door or let me have a kid. ‘And for the first time, I feel like I actually I told God how I felt.”
Underwood said a doctor’s visit several days later confirmed her current pregnancy was healthy. “I went to the doctor to, like, confirm, another miscarriage. And they told me everything was great!”
“Right after finding out that I would lose a baby, I’d have a writing session, I’d be like, ‘Let’s go.’ You know, I can’t just sit around thinking about this,” she told CBS Sunday Morning.
She continued: “’Cause I would literally have these horrible things going on in my life, and then have to go smile and, like, do some interviews or, like, do a photo shoot or something, you know? So it was just kind of, like, therapeutic, I guess.”
Consequently, the songstress says many of the tunes on her newly released album relate to her experiences. “I feel like there’s a lot of songs, there’s several songs on the album that came from that, you know, or I connect with in a totally different way because of those experiences that we went through,” she said. “And they were hard. And it sucked so much! But things are looking better.”
The “Champions” singer announced her second pregnancy in an Instagram video on August 8. “Mike and Isaiah and I are absolutely over the moon and excited to be adding another little fish to our pond,” she said at the time.
As a source told Us Weekly that same month that the star is also still considering adoption: “Carrie does still talk about adopting children because she truly does want a large family and wants to be a mom to several kids.”
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